Friday 26 November 2010

It's Not Over till the Fat Lady Spins...


It is my general feeling that reality TV is a bust,
As those that defy its (true) purposes have become the public must.

Keeping in the likes, of Widdecombe, Wagner and McKeith,
To evoke salacious headlines, that are truly beyond belief.

Fainting fits and ridiculous claims that the old bat is (cough) ‘with child’,
Have the viewers agog and the press tuned in and her fellow jungle folk riled.

Sheryl Gascoigne has been booted out as McKeith goes slowly mad,
Raving like a loony behind jungle bars, things ain’t never looked so bad.

Meanwhile hopping back across, to this cold dark side of the world,
It’s the voters who’ve lost their marbles, perhaps you haven’t heard.

Seems us Brits have a penchant, for uncoordinated former PMs,
And loonies that lie and Brazilians that try, to send us to our wits’ end.

Yes poor Anton’s back must be in want of a rub, after weeks of dragging around,
His less than svelte partner whose misshapen routines, just worsen with every round.

There’s no room for talent, it seems, any more – no instead we’re just after some laughs,
As Strictly and X cater to an audience intent on garnering a farce.

The real X Factor favourite, he of the decorator’s hat,
Concerned about W’s voting power, last week cornered his foe in a spat.

Brawling at show rehearsals Matt accused the Brazilian of being rude,
Bad-mouthing their fellow contestants, with comments upsetting and lewd.

Convinced that Wagner will win, when it comes to the show finale,
He branded W a “joke” and said he had a “terrible feeling”,

That the TV terrorists who are keeping him in will be out in force on that day,
Condemning the real stars and their fans to a television parody.

Week after week he sails on through smug written all over his face,
Well I urge you people of Britain to knock him out before it’s too late.

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